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June 2011

The end of the road, is the beginning of a new journey.

This past weekend our youngest child graduated from High School.

As is the norm for me when a child reaches a milestone such as this I am filled with excitement for their future, pride over their accomplishments and sadness for how quickly those times went by.

I thoroughly enjoyed being a mom, a cab driver, coach, tutor, dishwasher, well not so much the dishwasher, but all the other jobs involved with being the mom of nine kids in school.

As much as I might have been overwhelmed at times, and would day dream of time to myself, I never really thought about what came after the last child left home.

When I was a cop, that is what I identified with, it was what made me, me. Then when I took an early retirement to stay home with my blended family of nine kids, I became a mom, and that became what made me, me.

Now with Alexi moving on to further his education in New York, I feel a need to once again figure out what will make me, me.

I will always look back so fondly at the chaos and pandemonium that our life was when they were all at home. I will miss the pillow fights, the oldies nights of roller blading in our kitchen. The long late night talks with a downcast teen or being up with a child who needed comforting. I will long for the days of making different voices while the "puppets" read the kids stories and lugging sweaty sleeping kids into bed.

But most of all I will miss the little gifts made with love, the home made cards and school recitals and hearing the musical note of one of my children calling out "mom" just to make sure I was there.

I realize that all journeys must come to an end, but the most important thing that I, we, need to remember is that when one road ends, another is wide open for us to take.

My children have gone on to have kids, careers, lives and adventures of their own and we can continue to show them the way by having adventures of our own that we can share over the rare times that we can all gather together as a family. Fam2009

The story telling, the sharing, the sheer joy of being together once again will re-enforce to me how much the memories of the past make way for the possibilities of the future.

Grab the toothbrush baby, my bags are packed and I am ready to hit the road!


Hello old friend, I 've missed you!

So its been humbling to have to figure out how to lose weight when I never had that issue before. I was always the one that could fit back into her clothes days after giving birth to my kids. I gave birth 4 times and with the exception of the last one, that had always been the norm, me back in my old clothes.

When I had my last son, due to a surgery and stress due to a marriage coming to an end I used food for comfort and it took me two years to take the weight off. But it came off and stayed off until a few years ago.

I was always active as a police officer, as a runner and into martial arts as well as running around with my four kids and the new four I inherited when I got re-married. Once again i was my normal weight and normal size.

Due to a bunch of circumstances and an annoying illness i was unable to workout like I was used to and the weigth came on. When I retired from being a cop and lost my identity in the process more weight came on.

Now I have decided that I can continue to use my illness, my retirement or my life as an excuse for my weight increase or accept the fact, that since I have dropped 3 pounds in two weeks since I have been monitoring what goes into my mouth, that excuse is null and void.

So I have finally taken my life and my body back, by doing what I already knew worked. Eating healthy and being active. It has nothing to do with me getting older, or being ill. it has to do with me losing focus and making excuses for not working out or eating healthy.

So as I embark on this journey, at a time when circumstances has dumped a very sad situation in our lives, I realize that exercise and eating healthy is the most important thing I can do for myself and for my family right now.

So to my fellow travelers on this road of rediscovery and re-affirmation, cheers and let's keep each other on the straight and narrow!